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Dead Thing

you will slowly stop loving me
and I will decay
where there was once beauty will be a stump
where a long time ago flowers grew
I blossomed when I was with you
and I was always like the tree of you
because I could only ever compare to the root of anything so beautiful
but now I will become food for scavengers
vultures rodents and funghi
the ugly organisms that lurk in the undergrowth
by extension I will be them
ugly decaying
and no matter how hard I try
I will not reach above past the canopy to be nurtured by sunlight
and I won’t blossom
without you I am just a dead thing


I’m sorry I love you more than anything and I’m sorry you are my universe and I’m even sorry you are the reason my sun rises and sets in the right parts of the sky and my moon reflects it’s light at night.

I’m sorry I fell for you, I’m sorry that you’re so perfect and I’m sorry I don’t want anyone else. I’m sorry for every time one of us cried, laughed, smiled. I’m sorry I made you happy and I’m sorry it was only temporary.

I’m sorry you want to just give up and I’m so sorry that you’re just going to leave me, I’m sorry I tried and I’m sorry I cared.

I’m sorry I would sacrifice everything I have for you and I’m sorry I struggle to believe that you love me like I love you because before I met you and before you made me feel like I could fly, like I could achieve anything, like I was good enough I never thought feelings like those were even possible and I’m sorry but this is gonna hurt me a lot more than it does you.

And I wish I could tell you I’m sorry, but this apology is for me.

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